So I heard this stupid joke about Unitarian Universalists, which, stupid as it may be, I can’t resist passing along to you.

So these two Unitarian Universalists die, and next thing they know they find themselves standing in line in front of these large pearlescent gates. Somewhat to their surprise, they’re actually waiting in line to talk with St. Peter. When their turn finally comes, St. Pete asks them what religion they used to be, and they say, “Unitarian Universalists.”

“Hmm, Unitarian Universalists,” replies St. Pete. “Well, even though you’re heretics, because you did so much social justice work on earth, you can go into heaven.”

The two Unitarian Universalists look at each other, and one of them says, “You mean you actually send people to hell?”

“Oh yes,” says St. Peter.

So they step out of line, and start picketing the gates of heaven, carrying signs that read, “St. Peter Unfair to the Damned!” and “Give the Damned a Second Chance!”

Probably they started chanting “One two three four/ Stay away from heaven’s door!/ Five six seven eight/ We are going to close hell’s gates!” — and handing out leaflets depicting St. Peter with a big red “X” over his face — but the joke doesn’t say one way or the other. And stop complaining — I told you it was a stupid joke.