A Catholic priest, a Wiccan priestess, and a Unitarian Universalist minister went out for a drive together. The UU minister was driving when a rabbit suddenly ran in front of the car. The minister swerved, but too late — the rabbit was squashed flat.

The UU minister stopped the car, and said, “I feel so terrible, I killed that poor rabbit.”

The Catholic priest said, “Don’t worry, I’ll heal the rabbit.” He got out of the car and sprinkled holy water on the rabbit. Nothing happened.

So then the Wiccan priestess said, “Don’t worry, I’ll heal the rabbit.” She got out and cast a spell. Nothing happened.

So then the UU minister grabbed something from the trunk of the car. He came over, rubbed it onto the rabbit, and the bunny immediately got up and ran away. The Catholic priest and the Wiccan priestess said, “That’s amazing! What did you use?”

The UU minister replied, “Rogaine, hare restorer.”

I warned you it was bad.